Tag: Flash

FP268 – Coffin: Infrastructure, Part 1 of 3

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-eight.

Flash PulpTonight we present Coffin: Infrastructure, Part 1 of 3
(Part 1Part 2Part 3)
[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp268.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by Haywire.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Will Coffin, urban shaman, and Bunny, his wobbly compatriot, find themselves watching a race.

 

Coffin: Infrastructure, Part 1 of 3

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Nicholas Gretz, in a dirty pair of loose-tongued sneakers, eyed the murky pavement before him. Beside him roared a maroon 1965 Chevelle, which shivered under the forces its idling engine pushed through the bodywork of the car.

Nicholas had come to see a race.

Although he stood on the blacktop, the man had no fear of oncoming drivers. In a former life the road had been a highway, but, decades ago, its hazardous contours had caused it to be unhooked from the network that carried vacationing families and heavy-haul transports. The broad ditches had grown thick with underbrush, and the spruce and oak that lined the run sagged over the cement like weeping mourners, crowding the abandoned asphalt.

It hadn’t seemed so remote when he’d exited the new interstate. It had taken some searching before he could wheel gingerly onto the proper mud track, but, when he’d exited the driver’s seat and stretched his legs, he could hear far-off traffic – now, the close-walled lane was dominated by the rumble of the V8.

It was five minutes after midnight.

The evening had brought on a strong moon, but a brewing storm made it difficult for the light to find its way through the trees. Despite the conditions, Nicholas felt as if his gaze could trace every crack and pothole from his position to the turn, a short mile away.

He’d walked the place enough in the daytime that it might have even been true – he certainly needed no assistance to spot Lena.

At the distant corner, a girl of eighteen, whose long bleached hair shone against the dim, drifted from the scrub, and took her station at the center of the bend. She wore a men’s white t-shirt, over a ragged pair of jeans, and her thin wrist was laden with a cascade of glowing neon bracelets; pink, green, and purple.

Nicholas remembered watching that same delicate wrist intently as they’d stood waiting for her mom’s red Buick in the parking lot of Cowan’s roadhouse.

She’d been working. He’d been loitering.

“Lena!” he shouted. There was no answer; no look of recognition.

The girl raised her illuminated bangles, and the Chevelle’s rumbling thickened.

Gretz had once been a racer. He’d driven a 1987 Buick Regal.

At 12:11, a brown Ford pickup truck had approached in the northbound lane, and, without thinking, the girl dropped her hand to indicate they should wait, but, instead, had set free the finely-machined steel.

The air filled with the howl of controlled explosions and youthful disregard, then, with its departure, the Chevelle deposited a smoking layer of quickly-vapourising rubber in its wake.

Its headlights made no impression on the deep shadows, but its flame-hued rear bumper was somehow easily visible against the gloom.

Even in the roar, Nicholas recalled how a ‘65 Chevelle had seemed like a relic, and how quick he’d been to tell Dylan such.

For Gretz, time slowed.

At the half-mile mark he could see Lena’s face turn to horror, and her neon flailing become panicked.

CoffinThere’d been some question as to her heart’s preference, but the concern in her round eyes was clearly intended for the Chevelle. Within, Dylan had made an attempt to pull onto the soft shoulder, but his delayed reaction came too late.

The truck didn’t appear – the driver had spent the rest of his life learning to eat and write with his left hand, but had otherwise survived – and yet the noise was just as real as the original impact. The momentum of the pick-up’s heavy work-engine was enough to deflect the still-turning Chevelle, so that the muscle car’s back-end jumped from the concrete, and the vehicle twisted into the treeline.

Upon liftoff, however, the rear bumper carried with it Lena’s jaw and skull, sending her airborne in a radiant arc.

She landed in exactly the spot he’d watched her rise from.

From within the tangle of bush and timber that had grown along the road’s edge, a soft glimmer played on the leaves, and Gretz realized he was witnessing the afterglow of the wreck’s blaze.

He began to walk in its direction.

At the halfway point, he passed the race’s two other observers.

“I want to respect your privacy, and all that bull####,” said Bunny, “but Oregon’s nights are ####ing cold. Could you shuffle a little faster?”

Coffin, standing beside her, swung high his arcane silver chain, and kept his focus on the flickering ghost lights that were once a burning car.

Nicholas’ memory had no trouble filling in the blanks. His legs faltered as he moved beyond where he’d wrestled the Regal to a stop, but pressed on.

He worked hard to ignore the girl’s broken form as he pushed through the ferns and prodding branches.

Finally, standing beside the shattered Chevelle, he retrieved a mashed wad of ten dollar bills from the depths of his jeans’ pocket.

Then, as he’d been instructed, he tossed the money into the wreck’s phantom flames.

The race had kept him awake at night; Had pulled him from his bed; maybe had ruined his two attempts at marriage. He thought of the bleached blond girl with the supple wrist.

He began to weep.

“You win,” Nicholas told the dark, but the destruction had already begun to fade.

Seconds later, Lena followed.

(Part 1Part 2Part 3)

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP267 – Mulligan Smith in Use, Part 1 of 1

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-seven.

Flash PulpTonight we present Mulligan Smith in Use, Part 1 of 1

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp267.mp3]Download MP3
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This week’s episodes are brought to you by Haywire.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Mulligan finds himself chatting with a golf club carrying killer.

 

Mulligan Smith in Use, Part 1 of 1

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Despite the July heat, Mulligan Smith was still wearing his black hoodie as he sat beneath a broad-limbed elm and sipped at his coke slurpee.

Mulligan SmithThe grass was thick, and the sun was bright. It was rare for the private investigator, who spent so much of his time wandering Capital City’s concrete, to encounter such an plush expanse of green, and Mulligan was fighting the urge to take off his shoes.

If he hadn’t had an appointment, he knew he likely would have.

Finally, his thoughts were invaded by the sudden landing of what looked to be a white egg, some fifteen feet from his freedom-yearning toes.

A few moments later, a woman appeared to claim the ball.

“Sure beats a public park, though,” Smith replied to the surprised newcomer’s peaked eyebrow.

She was forty-four, with hair kept blonde by salon dyes, and a stomach kept flat by her time walking the course. Beneath her white visor – which matched her ivory shorts – she wore thin-rimmed sunglasses.

“It’s the privacy that makes it nice,” the detective continued, “but what’s the point of spending the effort in maintaining this pristine beauty if so few get a chance to use it?”

The dark lenses made it tough to judge her reactions, but Mulligan suspected she had an experienced poker face even under the best of conditions.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

“Waiting for you, Carol,” replied Smith.

“Waiting for me in the rough at the fourth hole’s dog leg?” As she spoke, she retrieved a club from her bag. Her motions were calm, but, then, she had a weapon in her grip.

“Yes,” said Mulligan. “On Sunday it takes you about twenty minutes to get from the office to here, and another ten to hit the tee. You’re a little slow today, but I guess it’s because you don’t have to race your boss, Hartley, now that you’ve killed him – it was an accident though, right?

“Anyhow, you also have a terrible tendency to overpower your first stroke on this hole, so I figured this would be a nice place to meet for a quiet chat.

”Name’s Mulligan Smith, by the way.”

“How do you know all this?” asked the golfer.

She held off on her swing, but it was the only sign that he’d phased her.

Smith resolved to try harder.

“I’m a P.I.,” replied Mulligan, “I spent most of last June following you from green to green.”

“Why?”

“Your husband thought you were having an affair.”

The woman snorted, then, with a near-perfect roll of her shoulders, sent the ball high in the air.

It landed squarely on the fairway.

“Nicely done,” said Smith. “Of course, I discovered you were doing exactly what you’d said you were: Giving Hartley a mild bit of competition on the links while schmoozing, in hopes of winning a promotion back at the shop. The practice wasn’t getting you anywhere, though, was it? Well, that is, not till his funeral that September.”

Carol’s motions were deliberate as she returned the five iron back to its wheeled bag. “Guess not, otherwise I’d be on the green. It’s been an interesting chat, but it’s time for me to go.”

From beyond her retreating shoulder she added, “if you follow me, I’ll call security. Expect a restraining order shortly.”

“I’ve got video,” replied Mulligan.

She stopped and turned.

“Video?”

“Yeah, a few mean slices, and a few poorly timed hits of the long ball – all aimed generally at your boss’ noggin’.”

From over the rim of her glasses, Carol squinted.

“Oh, I get it now: Blackmail. Well, tough luck, pal, it was an accident. It wasn’t me that killed Hartley, it was his popping cyst, which I didn’t know about it.”

“That’s not what Craig says. He seems to recall you mentioning it repeatedly over the years. He remembers it especially because you don’t often have the chance for conversation.

“Tough to prove a case like that, maybe, but, between the recordings and your hubby’s word, I think we can probably prod a sympathetic member of the local constabulary into action.

”I hear Mrs. Hartley is getting married again – it might give her some comfort.”

“Craig? – but why?”

“To hear him tell it, he’s been pretty patient with your years of ass-kissing, but – even after cutting your green time down to just Sundays – once he learned of the extended work hours your promotion was going to mean, he realized your promise of having more time for him would never happen.

“I’ve been to your place, you know. It reminds me of this golf course, in some ways. Shame to build such a beautiful thing without getting any use out of it.

“My client is ready to move on. He wants a divorce. He also wants the house and the Prius. Most of all, though, he doesn’t want any arguments or lengthy legal proceedings. He knows how competitive you can get.”

Behind the tint of her glasses, Carol considered the proposition.

At the hole’s tee, a trio of frat boys had gathered. Their shaded eyes and exchanged shrugs had not yet worked them up to shouting something at the interfering loiterers, but Smith could tell, even at that distance, that it wouldn’t be long.

On Mulligan’s left, the sound of sprinklers drifted up from the depths of a small ravine.

“You know,” said Carol, “I hate golf. The problem is that I got a reputation as a solid player, and, though it didn’t help me with Hartley, it sure opened a few clients’ doors.

“Fine. Tell Craig – tell him I’m sorry, and that he can have all of it.”

Clearing his throat, Smith replied, “he’ll courier the paperwork to your office on Monday.”

She nodded, then, leaving her ball where it lay, she walked from the course and towards the parking lot.

Once she was gone, the detective stood and wiped the clinging clippings of greenery from his jeans.

In reality, although he had truly witnessed the near misses, Mulligan had no video. After a week and a half of observation he’d been entirely confident of her marital integrity, and so, as he wasn’t particularly a fan of amateur sports, he’d dumped the video to free up space for future paying endeavours.

Even if he’d kept it, however, he knew it was an aggrieved husband’s word against his wife’s, and unlikely to gain much traction in court.

It seemed like poor justice, but he hoped that Hartley’s widow might find some happiness, now that the way had been cleared for her impending marriage to Craig. Perhaps it was nothing more than their mutual sense of abandonment that had held them together since their meeting at a company function, but at least she’d get to spend some of Carol’s money.

With a shrug, Mulligan headed for his Tercel.

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FPGE7 – The Pilling, by Rich the Time Traveler

Welcome to Flash Pulp Guest-isode 7.

Flash PulpTonight we present The Pilling, by Rich the Time Traveler

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulpGE7.mp3]Download MP3
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This week’s episode is brought to you by The Mob.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, we present a tale regarding a finicky feline, as provided by our own Rich the Time Traveller.

 

The Pilling, by Rich the Time Traveler

Written by Rich the Time Traveller
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

The young blonde girl bounded quickly through the bedroom doors. She carried a writhing mass of white, black, and caramel-mocha colored spots that twisted and resolved itself into a calico cat.

“I got her,” she said cheerfully still dressed in half pajamas and half school clothes.

The man and the woman turned to her from the hustled chaos of their morning preparations. The man was in a dull grey t-shirt bearing the faded design of some inside joke or geeky reference long rendered unreadable with sweat shorts of the same hue. The woman contrasted in a full-length pajama shirt of yellow that was painfully bright for the hour. The opposition of their palettes was united by their similarly pillow rustled hairstyles.

“Nice work sweetheart. Put her in the bathroom, would you?” the woman requested. Raising her voice she added, “And finish getting ready for school. Have you and your brother brushed your teeth yet?” An audible groan of frustration came from the hallway at that signaling the unseen boy had, indeed, not completed that task yet.

The girl propelled the complaining cat through the second doorway to her right and pulled the door shut. “I have,” she exclaimed and bounced out the way she’d originally come, half-humming and half-singing an unidentifiable song to herself.

“Let’s get this over with before she goes crazy in there,” said the man nodding his head towards the now-shut door. “It’s not fair making her wait for it.”

Agreement washed across the woman’s face and she moved with him towards the room. Reflexively he gave her shoulders a squeeze as he came up behind her and, after rubbing them for a few seconds, scratched her back.

“That feels good. A little lower… harder,” she breathed as his nails worked across her nightshirt and then he reached past her to open the bathroom door.

They stepped into the neat and mundane room shutting the opening behind them. It was of typical and unremarkable suburban construction. A shower, a far too small bathtub, a far too large mirror, the ubiquitous bar of lights, double sinks molded in synthetic cultured marble, and safely tasteful light tan tiles. Secretly the woman wished the original owners had been a little bolder in their choices of decor, but they had made their own mark in the time they’d lived there. The walls were a deep turquoise-blue color and a piece of stained glass hung in the oversized window above the tub depicting a river flowing through a mountain range; though with the faint rays of sun passing from the outside, the rich azure looked more like an abyssal crevasse instead. The man had been less covert with his sentiments and had expressed them on many occasions. He would have liked nothing more than to rip the whole space apart and rebuild it with a much more efficient layout, but that would have to wait until a future opportunity arose.

The cat hunched between the two basins with her tail of black and brown curled around her feet as a tortie-colored trim. She let out a growl that quickly fell apart to a plaintive meow.

“She’s in a mood today, isn’t she?” the woman pondered disinterestedly.

The man nodded and mumbled a yes as he retrieved an indigo and cream striped towel that lay folded by the tub. Wordlessly, he handed it to the woman who unfurled it and moved towards the cat. The feline target only dipped her face and pleaded with big eyes as the woman wrapped the cloth around her, leaving just the calico’s head protruding.

Meanwhile, the man had slid to the other side of the counter and had picked up an amber colored bottle. Popping the top, he dumped the contents onto his hand. A single pink half-circle nestled in the cracks of his palm. The cat redoubled her effort and managed another weak growl.

“Come on, girl,” said the man in a gentle but slightly irritated voice. “Last dose. Seven down, one to go.”

He turned and plucked a white plastic tool from a cup in what was clearly marked as his own area by the other items surrounding it. Taking it in one hand, he pushed back a plunger with his thumb and then pressed the half-pill inside a pair of soft rubber flaps on the opposite end.

Reaching out with his free hand, he scritched the head of the cat and then rubbed it briefly. “Relax, this won’t take long and then you can be on your way.”

The cat struggled within the linen embrace of the woman. “She’s really wound up. I don’t know what’s gotten into her.”

“Yeah,” asserted the man has he placed his thumb and first finger on either side of the calico’s mouth and began to lever her jaw open.

The cat gave a low mewl and lurched unexpectedly. The woman gave sharp cry and the irritated animal broke free and flew from where she’d been held.

“You OK?” asked the man, dropping the piller.

“The little bitch got me with her back claws.” The woman turned her wrist and revealed a scarlet rivulet running from the puncture in her forearm.

“I think the correct term is Queen,” replied the man stepping closer to inspect the wound. The woman’s eyes clearly underscored that she didn’t find his joke funny this time, or likely the first hundred times he had used it. A single pregnant orb of blood fell from her arm onto the vanity and shattered making many spindly legs about the point of impact. The man grabbed the towel and wiped it away and then pressed it to the woman’s injury without further comment.

“I swear if she caused me to get any on my shirt, I’m going to use her to make hat,” remarked the woman with the practice of an old and hollow threat while she inspected her pajamas for any freckles that may have splattered on them.

The man lifted the cloth and, satisfied that the bleeding had stopped, handed it back to the woman before walking to where the bundle of claws and fur had escaped. Stepping in the tub, he plucked her from the corner above it where she was huddled and slightly shaking. The calico complained meekly as he lifted her by the scruff.

“You know deep inside this is good for you and you don’t want that UTI coming back so just cooperate, OK?” scolded the man pointlessly.

The pair worked speedily and the cat once more had her paws ensconced safely, though more tightly than originally. The man plucked the rod from the surface and, once he’d verified the medicine was still in place, quickly pulled the calico’s jaw open with his free hand. Darting the tool towards the open mouth, he snapped the plunger home with his thumb sending the pill tumbling into her throat. He now held her mouth gently shut and, after waiting a few seconds to be sure she had swallowed it, gave the mottled head a playful tussle.

Their body language signaling relief, the man and woman stepped away and let the towel fall from the cat. The man turned the faucet on his sink to a slow trickle.

“There, it’s over. You wanna drink of water to wash it down, girl?” he asked.

Kar'WickThe cat remained motionless and growled. Suddenly the white, black, and caramel-mocha hair was all standing on end and she gave a loud hiss that faded back to a moan as she leapt from the counter. Diving to the floor, the calico sprinted across it to cower behind a pair of overflowing hampers where she began caterwauling; quite in earnest this time.

“What crawled up her a…,” the woman started only to have her words cut short by a shattering sound. A spear of shiny black chitin pierced through the large window and cleaved the stained glass in two along the course of the river.

“What the fuck!?” said the man much less rhetorically than usual, but no answer would come. As a rumbling sound grew and the house shook, the walls and ceiling were ripped away to leave them all face-to-many-eyed-face with Kar’Wick, the Spider God.

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP266 – All Things Being Equal, Part 1 of 1

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-six.

Flash PulpTonight we present All Things Being Equal, Part 1 of 1

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp266.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by All Things Geek.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Capital City finds itself in need of a hero.

 

All Things Being Equal, Part 1 of 1

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

The news had drawn Madeline to the river’s edge.

In those days, breaking news was a rare event in Capital City, and so, when she’d realized the bridge-jumper pinned beneath the camera’s gaze was only blocks away, she’d hurried to leap on her ten-speed, Galahad.

As she’d unplugged her cellphone from the charging cord on the kitchen counter, her mom had asked, “Maddy, where you going?” and she’d replied, “to the bridge.”

Madeline felt some guilt at intentionally not mentioning the gathering crowd and unfolding drama, but the girl had known her mother would be quick to deny her the adventure.

Now, she was finding it difficult to continue to hold her tongue.

“Careful, you don’t want to go in with her. Half of ‘em survive the fall, but they at least get a chance to prepare themselves,” stated the nearest officer, at whose back she was staring. “Even then, they always pick up a few broken bones on impact.”

The figure at the center of the affair endlessly paced a metal beam at the structure’s brink. Though the span was blocked at either end, the suicidal pedestrian sometimes neared to a point just feet from Madeline – so close, the girl thought, that she could almost reach out and pull her to safety.

It was close enough, certainly, to hear the ragged woman’s sobbed pleas.

“I’ve tried everything,” she said. “Everything! Why won’t anyone help me?”

Madeline had, in fact, come to help, but, much to her frustration, the police weren’t letting her through. It annoyed the girl that her experience as a hero meant so little. A year previous, when she’d been ten, she’d managed to save a man’s life.

She’d found him in a double rutted back-lane running off of Gibraltar Road, crumpled between a huge green compost bin and a white-paneled shed.

He’d started at her approach, and she could see his oversized black suit was wet with blood.

“Are you OK?” she’d asked.

She’d gotten used to watching men fall down when dad was still living with them, but the blood was something new.

At the sight of it, Madeline had bitten her lip, and repeated her question.

“Are you OK?”

“No, not really,” was the man’s reply, but his voice had sounded younger than she’d expected. Turning his head had obviously been a difficult chore, but his eyes had swept left, then right, taking in the full length of the dirt lane’s scrubby bushes and unpainted fences. Maddy had found herself doing the same.

There was no one else at hand.

The man had righted himself then, using the shed for leverage and support.

His fingers painted a red fan on the plastic siding.

“You don’t happen to have a cell, do you?” he’d asked.

This was the moment she’d dreamed of as she’d run Galahad through puddles and over curbs, and it almost seemed too easy that the solution would simply pop from her pocket.

Nonetheless, it was no easy thing for the man.

The call was short, but the wait was long.

She kept him talking. He refused to answer any questions about why he was there, but he was happy enough to discuss the manga InuYasha, an unexpected common interest.

Still, the pain had been intense, and he’d wept as his friends pulled their black van to a stop, but he’d said it: He’d said that she’d saved his life.

He had also extracted a latex mask – a caricature of a man’s face, with huge sideburns and a wicked grin – from the interior of his coat. It was far too big for her, but she sometimes liked to put it on and stare at herself in her room’s star-stickered mirror.

Then he’d given her a phone number.

“If you ever need help – serious help – you text there.

“I might not answer, but someone will.”

She’d never used the digits. She hadn’t had a reason to until she wrote, “there’s a lady on the Lethe bridge, and no one’s DOING anything!”

For fifteen minutes she split her focus between the small message screen, and the bawling woman.

In despair, she sent a follow-up: “You said you would help me!”

Another half-hour passed.

The conflicted had taken to sitting, and creeping her ragged jeans towards the edge of the steel lip that was her too-short seat.

With tears of frustration in the corners of her eyes, Madeline began shouting at the reluctant officer.

“You’ve got to do something, damn it!”

She knew he’d been trying – that he’d been complaining about the lack of a boat on the scene moments before – but her anger at the situation demanded a target.

“There are protocols. We’re doing everything we can,” he replied. “You just stay calm, li’l lady – or are you a lady? That was some mighty strong language for someone so young.”

“Wait till you hear the language I’ll use if you don’t do something.”

“Listen, we’re trying to lock her up as quickly as we can, but -”

A hush fell over the spectators, causing the bing from Maddy’s pocket to echo like a cough in a library.

The source number was blocked, and the message said simply, “We’re coming.”

Suddenly, Maddy was the last thing on the cop’s mind.

After surveying the river, he turned to his partner.

“Fuck me,” he said,”it’s The Achievers.”

Once they’d been little more than Internet myth, a group of anonymous vindicators responding to cries for help from the lost and forgotten.

Recently, however, they’d grown more brazen.

A dozen swan boats, each powered by a latex-faced metalhead wearing an oversized black suit, appeared from beyond the waterway’s curve. A tarp was affixed, with taught nylon rigging, to the birds’ sleek white necks, so that a broad expanse of blue stretched between them. At the center of the surface lay, apparently jokingly, a pair of throw pillows.

As the masked invaders peddled ever to the left, the assembled raft was locked in perpetual rotation, and moved forward only because the river carried it along.

“God damn Busby Berkeley film,” said the officer.

“Oi! Come on down, the water’s fine!” shouted the temporarily-nearest Achiever.

Above, the despondent form stiffened.

“It’s OK – we’ve done the math!” coaxed the mask, his tone now more serious.

Seconds lingered. There were no more pleas as the jumper stared from her perch. To Maddy, it felt as if the impending-suicide was simply waiting for the illusion of help to dissipate.

The girl only had Galahad and her phone, but, again, it would be enough.

Everyone’s focus was on the boats below, or so they later claimed, as none stepped forward when asked by the press to identify who had thrown the aging hunk of plastic.

It was a good toss, which landed squarely in the wailer’s cloud of light-brown hair. With a notable thud, the cell ricocheted from her frozen skull, clattered against the steel rail, then dropped onto the makeshift safety net.

The woman was close behind.

The suits moved quickly, to secure her in one of the boats, before slicing the ropes that connected them.

With a wave, The Achievers pull-started the small black engines affixed to their waterfowls, then sped out of sight.

Finally, grinning, Madeline knocked back Galahad’s kickstand and turned towards home.

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP200 – The Death of Ruby, Part 1 of 1

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred.

Flash PulpTonight we present The Death of Ruby, Part 1 of 1

Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

Tonight’s episode is brought to you by The Mob.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Ruby meets her end.

 

The Death of Ruby, Part 1 of 1

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Narration by Peter Church
with Additional voices by Opopanax, and Dancing Ella
Art by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

RubyThe party was a quiet affair, just her son, his new fiancee, her parents, and a few friends from town. They’d all parked along the double-rutted lane before entering the yard of her home – one of the last to be able to claim to be truly rural in New York state – and were now seated in the plastic white lawn-chairs she’d scattered around the fire pit.

Her knee had ached as she mounted the trio of steps that led to her patio, and pushed aside the sliding screen door she used to enter the kitchen. She’d been seeking the double stack of red plastic cups that she’d picked up for the occasion, in preparation for dispensing the rummy punch Maggie had constructed.

Turning back to the party, with cups in hand, she had paused at the exit, watching Maggie The Server stiffly trundling around the group with the cheese and cracker plate.

It was while tearing open the transparent wrapper that Ruby spotted the intruder moving into the half-circle of chatting well-wishers.

“No,” she said, “no, damn you, no.”

She’d heard the story only two nights before – a former lover of her son’s chosen, unrelenting in his refusal to accept her spurning. The girl had told the tale with tears in her eyes.

The newcomer ratcheted the shotgun in his hands, and all talk ceased.

Dropping the cups, the aging woman sprinted to her living room.

Outside the home, the gate-crasher made his intentions clear. Without breaking for explanation, he leveled his weapon at Mr. McReardon and fired. The proud father’s lawn chair toppled backwards, and the dying man’s brown trouser legs twitched briefly before halting all movement.

“Angie,” said the gunman, turning on the freshly engaged woman. “This is all your -”

Barefoot, Ruby made no effort to check her momentum as she plunged through the screen door.

For a moment she almost seemed to shift in time: There was no more bad knee, there was no sleeping in on high thread-count sheets, there was no escape – there was only Bethany, snatched down from her place on the mantle, and a threat – always a threat – with no answer but the blade.

Somewhere, she thought she might have heard the old General howl.

It was only as the mad woman cleared the end of the deck in a single bound, and came pounding the turf in his direction, that the intruder managed to convince himself of the reality of the situation.

He pulled the trigger, finally, sending burning buckshot into her ribcage, but she briefly shrugged off the effect.

Then she did what she’d always done, and cleaved his skull.

Ruby’s last living sight was of the wind ruffling the elms she’d planted thirty-five years earlier.

* * *

She woke with Bethany in her hands.

There was a thin faced woman leaning over her, whose eyes moved continuously between her own and the door of the small thatched hut in which they were seated.

To Ruby, it seemed not as if she’d woken from a dream, but more as if she’d been distracted during a conversation, and could no longer remember what the topic had been before a sudden interruption.

“What?” she asked.

Her custodian smiled.

“Valhalla – where those who’ve died gloriously are taken.”

“I – huh.”

Ruby was surprised to see she was wearing jeans and a t-shirt she’d lost in the early days of the zombie plague, and she wondered briefly what her reflection would reveal should she encounter a mirror.

There were more pressing questions, however.

“Who are you?”

“Most call me Katharina Pfiati, although I was once known simply as The Butcher,” replied her thin-faced companion.”

“The Butcher?”

“Yes, there was a night upon which I laid to rest twenty men.”

“Twenty? How?”

“Very quietly.”

The conversation’s lull allowed Ruby to note the gunfire in the distance.

“I’ve seen Jacob’s Ladder,” she said. “Is this just some crazy last-hurrah rollercoaster ride my brain is giving me while I bleed out on the lawn? Am I about to die hallucinating? Is this world just built on adrenaline and shock? ”

Before her companion could answer, the cloth blocking her view to the exterior shifted aside, and a man in a slightly vintage US Marine uniform stepped into the room.

“Nah, the world’s real enough,” he replied. “It’s a bit like a quilt, stitched out of all the notable battlefields. It loops, though – or maybe it’s just round. I once convinced a guy to give me a ride in his sabre jet, and we spent the day doing laps. It took about eight hours to fly across, if my watch is to be trusted. On the other hand, the landscape tends to move every now and then, so don’t get too comfortable with any mental maps you might build.

“As to the rest, well, you’re already dead, so you ain’t likely to get much deader. You’re also late, which is sort of weird, but sometimes the valkyries like to take the long way home.

”Name’s Jenkins, by the way – Cutter or Leroy, whichever you prefer.”

Despite her ghostly status, Ruby found his handshake reassuringly solid.

“Time to go meet the boss,” said Cutter.

“Boss?” she asked. She’d never been a fan of being told what to do.

Jenkins caught the tone in her voice. “Oh, he’s nice enough. Some of the old timers have a problem with him – apparently he’s only been in management of the place for the last couple hundred years – but Blackhall’s a solid guy.”

The words made little sense to Ruby, but, as the trio strolled through the smoking remains of a formerly grassy field, it seemed that there would be plenty of time for explanations.

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FPGE6 – Not My Line of Work, by Dean Bryant Johnson

Welcome to Flash Pulp Guest-isode 6.

Flash PulpTonight we present Not My Line of Work, by Dean Bryant Johnson

[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulpGE6.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episode is brought to you by The Charred Tree.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, we present a tale of professions and professionalism.

 

Not My Line of Work, by Dean Bryant Johnson

Written by Dean Bryant Johnson
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

CoffinGiselle stamped from the room and slammed the door. Hamm was fairly certain this was the first time he had ever seen a dame stamp her way from any room so effectively while wearing six-inch heels. Sure, some had tried but it’s difficult to take a mad woman seriously when she’s waving her arms around like a ceiling fan trying to keep her balance. But Giselle…Giselle had pulled it off. Walked those gams across the floor as graceful as you please, flung open the door without a moment’s hesitation, and slammed it so the glass rattled violently in its frame; the last letter slipped and nearly fell. He’d have to fix that. It was already a challenge to get paying clients to take him seriously with a name like Hamm Packer; he could only image the snickering his colleagues would send into their sleeves if that second m disappeared. The thought made him frown.

“Fer cryin’ out loud!” he said under his breath as he stood and began to cross the sparsely furnished office to repair the lettering. Hamm froze when a loose floorboard creaked. He hadn’t heard the elevator groan its way to the main floor yet so Giselle was likely still in the hallway. The last thing he needed was for her to come back—while she’s a looker, the only thing he really wanted at this point was for her check to clear the bank—so he stopped and waited quietly for the aging machinery to announce the all clear. After thirty seconds of agonizing silence Hamm heard the elevator screech open, crisp footsteps walking into it, and the screech in reverse as the car closed. He felt more than heard the elevator descend to the first floor. He straightened the last letter of his first name and pressed as hard as he dared. There, that’s better—Hamm Packer, Private Investigator.

The telephone rang as he returned to his desk. He lifted the receiver while reaching for a pencil. “Packer.”

“Mr. Packer. Good. You’re still there. I need to see you as soon as possible.” Her voice was calm but painted with a layer of urgency. A bit of an accent—too little to reliably identify—gave her voice an exotic sound. Hamm looked at his watch—8:37.

“Well, I was about to turn the lock and call it a night. How does tomorrow sound?” The day had started with an ugly hairball left by an ill-tempered cat on the bathmat and had ended with an angry client with legs up to here nearly destroying the entry to his place of business. Best to not push his luck and start over in the morning.

“Oh! That’s no good. I’m leaving by the early train. Can’t you please help me? Can I buy you dinner while I explain my problem?” Her voice dripped anxiety with an edge of desperation.

Work hadn’t exactly been beating a path to his threshold lately and the bank account could always use some more dough. Worst case? Tuck away some groceries and hear someone’s story. Maybe he could do something, maybe not. It could be worse—most clients would never even consider buying him a meal.

“You know a place called Dorset’s Tavern, Miss…..?”

“Ortice. Antonia Ortice, Mr. Packer. And yes, I know where it is. Would you like me to meet you there?” Hamm could almost feel the gratitude pouring through the phone line.

“No! No, not there. That’s not a good place for us to talk business.” The few times Hamm had walked by Dorset’s, the hairs on his neck had stood on end. Something seemed to warn respectable people away from that place. “Opposite side of the street and at the other end of the block is The Stockyard Grill. I hope steak is fine with you.” Hell, when a client offers to buy you a meal, you treat yourself to something a little better than a bag of cheese doodles and a slurpee.

Two hours later Hamm Packer pushed away the large plate that held only a bone and the wreckage of a much-abused baked potato. He sipped his iced tea and looked over the edge of the glass at Antonia Ortice. He was glad he had let her buy him a steak because he certainly wasn’t gonna take this case.

“So let me get this straight. Your father died a few days ago and now he’s haunting you. But before he died he told you that some heirloom piece of jewelry could protect you?” Nope. Saying it aloud didn’t make it any less insane. Glad this place was getting ready to close—fewer people around to hear the crazy-talk.

“Not him alone, Mr. Packer–all of them. Every one of my Ortice ancestors. My father’s journal says it will begin with the first new moon after his death, so I have less than a month to find this thing and reclaim my life.” Antonia closed her eyes. Her fingers pinched and caressed the ridge between her eyes and she shook her head. “I know it sounds preposterous. I don’t want this to happen to me. I have a life of my own, dammit! I don’t need the dead bothering me.” She slammed her fist on the table. The flatware and her untouched water jumped with the impact.

“Look, Miss Ortice, I’m gonna be straight with you. I could use the money—really, I could—and I might even be able to find this brooch or pin or whatever it is for you, although I wouldn’t make any promises on that. I couldn’t help you on the mumbo-jumbo part of it. I have no idea where to begin and I’m not even convinced I believe in such things.” He folded his hands on top of the wadded napkin in front of his plate. “I’m sorry, Ma’am. I can’t take your case.”

Antonia’s gaze fell to her lap. “Thank you for your honesty, Mr. Packer. I appreciate that you at least took the time to hear my explanation of the situation.” A tear slid down her cheek as she handed her credit card to the waitress. “What I should do next?”

“Let me give it some thought.” He swirled the ice and the last half inch of tea in the glass. “I’ve heard rumors of a guy here in the city that dabbles in magic and voodoo…that kind of stuff.” Hamm retrieved a small spiral pad and a pencil from his jacket and made a note. “Might also check with some of my other contacts. If nothing else maybe they can get me a line on Mr. Bedknobs-n-Broomsticks.”

The waitress–her barely legible name tag proclaimed her to be Vera–returned with Antonia’s credit card and the slip for her to sign. “Can I get you folks anything else?”

“No. No thank you. Everything was wonderful.” Antonia said it by rote while she figured the tip.

“Um…if you don’t mind my saying….” Vera whispered. Packer could tell by her body language that she was nervous to say anything so he smiled to reassure her and motioned for her to continue. “I couldn’t help but hear you discussing the ghost and magic fella. You looking for him?”

“Yes we are, Vera. Do you know where we might find him?” Packer had learned to keep the tone conversational. Sources tended to make like a clam if they thought they were being interrogated.

“He’s called Coffin. Don’t think I ever heard anyone use a given name for him, not that you’d need one with a something as memorable as that. You can usually find him at Dorset’s a couple nights a week.” She indicated the direction with a general wave. “Strange place that but it seems to suit Mr. Coffin. If he’s not there I bet old Dorset could point you in the right direction.”

“Thank you, Vera. You’ve been very helpful.” Hamm extended his hand. Vera shook it and left with the signed credit slip. “I hope you tipped her well, Miss Ortice, ‘cause she just answered your question of what to do next.”

“That’s near here, isn’t it? Can we go now?” Antonia clasped his arm as she spoke.

“Absolutely.” Packer drained the last of his tea before placing the empty glass next to his plate. “Let’s go.”

They stepped into Dorset’s and it was what Hamm would have expected had he ever taken the time to think consider it. Usually he would have loved a place like this—lots of wood with brass fittings, comfortable padded stools at the bar, billiards, and some dart boards to one side—but something made him want to leave, to find a more welcoming bar. “Well,” he said under his breath, “the good news is I’m not here to drink. I’m here to find this guy and then I’m done.” He excused himself forward and got the barman’s attention.

Hamm leaned over and spoke softly, barely loud enough for the man to hear, “I’m looking for Coffin. Someone told me I could find him here.” He slid a folded bill across the worn wood of the counter. The barkeep looked twice between the money and Hamm Packer’s face before deciding the money was good. He motioned with his head toward the back and Hamm’s eyes darted that direction. When his gaze returned to the polished wood the twenty was gone.

“He’s here, Miss Ortice.” He took Antonia by the arm and guided her deeper into the tavern where they could see the rear seating area. Three booths were occupied. The two on the right were occupied by couples obviously out for a night on the town. A man in a leather jacket sat alone drinking coffee in the one of the left. That had to be Coffin.

“Is that him?” Antonia was excited.

“Only person it could be. I tell you what. I got you here to the man himself so I think I’m done. Frankly, this place gives me the willies and I don’t think they like me being here—can’t put my finger on it, but after awhile you learn to go with your gut. You go see if that’s him. If it is, great and good luck. If not, I’ll help you find some other lead. Deal?” He could feel the eyes boring into the nape of his neck.

“Yes, that’s fine, Mr. Packer. Oh! Here.” She placed several folded bills in his hand as she shook it. “For the money you gave the bartender as well as for bringing me this far. Thank you so much for your help.” Antonia approached the leather-clad man. Hamm pocketed the money without counting it. He was certain this particular client was playing fair and honest. At least he wasn’t out the twenty he’d lost at the bar.

Hamm watched as Antonia approached the and addressed the man. He couldn’t hear their words but he knew she was asking if he was Coffin. He nodded and offered her the seat opposite him. Hamm hoped she found the answer to her problem. Maybe this Coffin guy could help her; Hamm sure as hell knew that he couldn’t.

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP265 – Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 6 of 6

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-five.

Flash PulpTonight we present Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 6 of 6
(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)
[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp265.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by Hume Speaks.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Ruby is caught between devouring flames and devouring dead.

 

Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 6 of 6

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Ruby Departed

(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP264 – Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 5 of 6

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-four.

Flash PulpTonight we present Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 5 of 6
(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)
[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp264.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by Hume Speaks.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Ruby encounters a force even more terrifying than the zombies that hunt her.

 

Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 5 of 6

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Ruby Departed

(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP263 – Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 4 of 6

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-three.

Flash PulpTonight we present Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 4 of 6
(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)
[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp263.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by Hume Speaks.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Ruby is forced to fend for herself amongst the staggering corpses that wander the countryside.

 

Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 4 of 6

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Ruby Sketch

(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.

FP262 – Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 3 of 6

Welcome to Flash Pulp, episode two hundred and sixty-two.

Flash PulpTonight we present Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 3 of 6
(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)
[audio:http://traffic.libsyn.com/skinner/FlashPulp262.mp3]Download MP3
(RSS / iTunes)

 

This week’s episodes are brought to you by Hume Speaks.

 

Flash Pulp is an experiment in broadcasting fresh pulp stories in the modern age – three to ten minutes of fiction brought to you Monday, Wednesday and Friday evenings.

Tonight, Ruby finds herself on trial.

 

Ruby Departed: Wasting Time, Part 3 of 6

Written by J.R.D. Skinner
Art and Narration by Opopanax
and Audio produced by Jessica May

 

Ruby Departed

(Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6)

 

Flash Pulp is presented by http://skinner.fm, and is released under the Canadian Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 2.5 License.

Freesound.org credits:

Text and audio commentaries can be sent to comments@flashpulp.com – but be aware that it may appear in the FlashCast.

– and thanks to you, for reading. If you enjoyed the story, tell your friends.