Skinner Co. Ink #34: Taking the Fun Out of Funnel
Tag: Coffee
Sunday Summary: Ideas
Dr. Who product idea: Tardis Ale – it’s 2 liters of beer in a 375 ml bottle.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 31, 2011
Snooki: that’s the British version of pool, right?
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 31, 2011
CNN Headline: “How college fails us” – my understanding was that they did it by first making us do tests, then grading those tests harshly.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) June 4, 2011
Skinner Co. R&D Staff: Project Moonjuice biochemists, please report to observation room 948a. Shipping Dept.: Free grape drink in room 948b!
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) June 3, 2011
I need an extra arm, so that I might hold a third coffee.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) June 3, 2011
Skinner Co. Staff: Remember; the red line is for shipping, scarlet is for receivables, guests follow crimson, & rose indicates a fire hazard
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) June 2, 2011
Stomach bug – strong enough that, if this were the fifties, I’d accuse it of being a communist plot and convene a congressional committee.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) June 2, 2011
New, from Skinner Co.: Nap-in-a-can! Coworkers too loud? There’s a can for that! Don’t think of it as chloroform – think of it as chloroFUN!
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 31, 2011
Skinner Co. Staff: Performance reviews begin Friday – please clearly label any cash-filled envelopes that you happen to forget in my office.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 30, 2011
Just realized that these rarely-worn shoes make a great drumming sound on this flooring. Rest of office is less enthused with my discovery.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 30, 2011
Sunday Summary: A Day Late & A Pony Short
CNN Headline: “Gaga’s new album brings down Amazon” – frankly, I’m feeling a little bummed about it as well.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 28, 2011
“Oh, you’ll talk, Wonder,” he said, pushing down the toaster’s plunger. #Breakfast
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 28, 2011
Skinner Co. Staff: While we encourage your steampunk endeavours – during your personal time – dueling is prohibited on company property.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 26, 2011
Skinner Co. Staff: Our 20-story office is not a schoolyard – please stop asking Janitor Wilkins to retrieve your lost balls from the rooftop
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 25, 2011
Skinner Co. Staff: Despite the rumours, Bill from Maintenance wasn’t Raptured – he ruptured. His spleen, specifically. Please sign his card.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 24, 2011
You can have my coffee when you pry it from my warm, trembling, hands.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 27, 2011
“Call me MISTER Coffee.” – In The Heat Of The Java
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 25, 2011
“I have always depended on the kindness of coffee.” – A Mug Named Desire
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 25, 2011
Mr Eight snuck in a note; it addresses me as secret agent & includes diagrams for defeating “Operation: Metallic Man”. Well played, Monday.
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 23, 2011
Considering undertaking some “poor man’s time travel”. (AKA: a nap.)
— JRD Skinner (@JRDSkinner) May 24, 2011
A Cup Of The Clown's
While out and about this weekend, suffering the same store-based woes faced by many this season, I spent some time trapped in a McDonald’s with two eight year olds. It isn’t the first time I’ve tried my mouth at their coffee, but I’m hoping it will be the last. The reason I bring it up, however, is to discuss something I found odd about the way Ronald goes about dispensing his caffeine.
The fluid itself is terrible, or at least in my opinion, so we won’t bother debating the flavour merits. What IS interesting though, is the sheer level of design they’ve put into delivering their vile clown-juice. The cups are double walled, a feature that saves you from the two-cup or little-ring-thing techniques, and the lid, when compared to the lids offered by other coffee-chuckers, is perfection.
I’m not saying you should check out McD’s brew, but I am saying someone needs to trick a Starbucks executive into holding one of their receptacles.