Category: goo brain

That'll Happen

Blast, my vacation plans – RUINED.

Chicken costumes banned at Nev. polling places

Voters dressed in chicken costumes won’t be allowed inside Nevada polling places this year.

State election officials on Friday added chicken suits to the list of banned items after weeks of ridicule directed at Republican Senate candidate Sue Lowden. – More from AP

Onward To Adventure and Gamy Meat

The new plan:

I’m going to lash together a number of office chairs, re-engineer some hockey sticks, and build myself a land-raft.

Then it’s off to live the life of a modern voyageur, roaming the highways and byways, scooping up roadkill for their pelts.

I should be able to sell the furs, and any rogue hubcaps I find, to meet my needs: food, WD-40 for the casters, and maybe a tarp for the rainy season.

Women and Imps

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOBReZOeDTY]

I’ve noticed an odd advertising trend. It seems to me there aren’t any supernatural uber-beings trying to sell products to men. Why is this?

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3kugHmbNgQ]

Maybe I’m approaching the question from the wrong direction: Why do advertisers feel a need to push products on women using the voice of a being that ought to be well beyond human comprehension? Do advertisers believe women to be more superstitious than men?

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hbZudFqv0M]

Why aren’t I turning on the TV to see Nazgûl attempting to sell me razors?

Listen, Money4Gold, Kar’Wick is ready and available, just give the word.

Kar'Wick, The Spider God

Modern Bear-Baiting

Did you know that bear-baiting still thrives in Pakistan?

Bear-baitingI sure didn’t:

Abolitionist: What happens to the dogs? Has WSPA rescued any dogs?

Fakhar: The dogs are owned by very powerful landlords in Pakistan. We haven’t started any confiscation of the dogs because we have basically been concentrating on the bears. Dogs also receive injuries but their physical needs are looked after very well by these landlords. The gypsies however make the bear’s claws blunt and they remove the bears incisors and canine teeth as they can’t pluck the molars and pre molars. These teeth are crushed by a hammer which is again a very painful and unnecessary procedure. One can only imagine how little these bears can defend themselves against the dogs.

– More          

Is China actually Dunder Mifflin?

This is an old piece from the New York Times, but I just came across it while digging through my fodder folder and thought it was worth another round of sharing:

AS an American journalist based in China, I knew there was a good chance that at some point I’d be detained for pursuing a story. I just never thought I’d be held hostage by a toy factory.

That’s what happened last Monday, when for nine hours I was held, along with a translator and a photographer, by the suppliers of the popular Thomas & Friends toy rail sets.

[…]

The scene was farcical. We were locked inside the factory gate, surrounded by 16 security guards and 4 or 5 factory bosses. All trucks trying to bring supplies in or out of the complex were rerouted. Inside, large crowds of factory workers in blue uniforms were gawking. A crowd had also gathered outside the gates.

The weird thing is, I can almost see this as a Chinese version of The Office, with Michael Zhū Scott desperately attempting to cover up his belief that lead in the paint gave the wood a delicious gleam.

Moanday

It creeps up on me, shaking me awake well before I’m rested. It looms just beyond the bed, impending and unstoppable.

I’ve discovered a solution however; a weapon strong enough to defeat even this hell beast.

So – Eat it, Monday:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wLWhSZ1Uvo]

(Yes, I know I’ve posted this before – complainers get seconds.)